every child must carry the weight of the flaws in, and mistakes made, by it's parents.
every child, without exception. which forces a parent to do two things:
1. try to minimize the number and consequences of their mistakes.
2. to try to recognize and freely acknowledge their own character flaws and make the effort, in full view of the child, to correct them, thereby setting an example for the child to follow.
#1 requires much forethought to accomplish, but even sound decisions have unintended consequences and should be resolved in a manner similar to #2.
it is also a parent's duty to introduce a proper amount of adversity into a child's life. A most difficult judgement for every parent, to induce just enough adversity so that the child can overcome it, and thereby learn the crucial lesson that to succeed they must apply themselves. In doing so the child can learn the nature of 'cause and effect' and through repetition, incorporate that lesson into their character in the form of habit.
hopefully somewhere along the way, the child will learn that there is no such thing as a "perfect" person, themselves included. but that fact does not negate the value of persistent effort at self-recognition and improvement. and in applying these truths and lessons will find that some flaws in others and themselves are livable. that everyone makes mistakes. and that to adjust their own assumptions and expections, of others and themselves, accordingly, will result in a healthier, happier, and more productive life, and the relationships which help to form it's content.
just by trying to do those two very unsimple things, in addition to thousands of other examples and obligations, a parent helps the child to grow strong enough to carry the weight of the burdens imposed upon them without their acquiescence.
stephenhurleysmith
11feb2007
